You all are pretty incredible, you know that? Thank you for reaching out, for the texts, emails, cards, offers of vacation homes (!!!) and just general love coming our way. So many of you have asked what you can do to help us out right now, and the truth is: you are helping, just by letting us know you're there if and when we do need something. As my friend Francesco Clark puts it, so many of you guys are showing up for us, virtually and otherwise. Thank you.
For now, I'm feeling okay, most of the time. We're still operating as a functioning household, most of the time. And I can't quite blame all of our disfunction on cancer, as much as I'd like to point fingers for the overflowing toilet yesterday morning. Hint: don't put baby wipes down old pipes. Oh, you knew that already? Lucky you.
Side note: did I tell you about the time I flushed a scorpion down the toilet, along with the approximately 42 paper towels I'd used to pick him up after smashing him with a wooden clog? Because I was worried the poison would still be harmful even from a dead scorpion, and it might seep through a regular number of paper towels. Yeah, that toilet overflowed, too.
So other than a few days post-treatment (and this dull headache I can't seem to shake, but that I blame on the 109-degree temps here and the fact that I'm perpetually dehydrated), I don't feel sick. I don't feel entirely well, either, but--and this is a big but--my symptoms are due to treatment, not cancer itself. An important distinction, don't you think?
Fatigue is still my biggest hurdle, but I've started going back to yoga a couple of times a week to try to combat it. You know, because exercise gives you energy, which you can then use to do four loads of laundry after mopping up the bathroom floor with every towel in the house when the toilet overflows. Win-win. I also believe a strong body will help me continue to tolerate treatment better than if I just sat around eating peanut butter cups all day. Plus, my oncologist says exercise is the best way I can maintain my good health. Ha.
I'm not able to keep up with Quinn round-the-clock, so he's still in daycare a few days a week. I try to preserve my energy for the days he's home, try to keep his life as normal, innocent, and filled with wonder as possible. I try not to worry.
You guys help keep my mind distracted (which seems to be a good thing, at least for my anxiety). You've invited us over for playdates, dropped in for dinner, offered us solace from the heat--we are so excited to leave Phoenix and come see a few of you this summer--and reminded me that in so many ways, my cup runneth over. My toilet, too.